Newly thrown out into the world with no one but my sphynx. ✌️
So many things that are way too complicated and shouldn’t even exist…
your bra strap is showing please hide it because it is suggestive. also your boobs are producing lumps in your shirt please hide them. your butt is in the same situation please get rid of it. also your legs. your arms. your face.
I can see your feet and it’s very distracting and slightly arousing.
wow 2004 was 10 years ago?? i
if I ugly snapchat you I trust you
If someone calls you ‘ugly’ have a good comeback and say ‘excuse me, I am not a mirror’.
when your friend starts telling an embarrassing story about you
when bad things happens to the person you hate
Graham : I’ve never understood the thing that Morgan Freeman said to you.
Jonah : Oh, so this was about 10 years ago, I did a film with Morgan Freeman, a really small film, and the first ten minutes of the film are just us driving together in a car, and talking, and it took three days to shoot and he didn’t talk to me the entire time. Like, in between takes, right ? Cause he had so much dialogue to learn, right ? So in between we wouldn’t really chat, but we were in a car together for three days…
what a beautiful day to stay indoors
sleep all day and blog all night
my problem with writing stories is that i’d rather imagine it and play it out in my mind than actually put it into words
phone calls are the most terrifying thing in the world
In 2007, a married couple filed for divorce after they realized that they were cheating on one another in an online chatroom - with each other.